Well, not quite, but my picture is in this entertainment newspaper:
When Kimi and I were in Hangzhou we spent one morning apart, she went shopping for clothes and I went to meet Reuben (as I mentioned in this post). Beforehand I decided to go for a walk around the city centre. I was making my way past one of the biggest department stores in Hangzhou (In Time), when a man and a woman approached me. I took the headphones out of my ears and heard the woman ask if I could speak Chinese (in Chinese). I said, "a little", and she spurted out a sentence that I couldn't grasp at all. I told her I didn't understand, so she started speaking English, and pretty good English too. By this point I was very wary, I only stayed around because they seemed amiable enough, but I was waiting to see how they wanted to get to my money. Usually this kind of thing is a con, they want to take you for tea, or to see some "art". It's all completely bogus and you end up paying for it. She told me that she and her friend worked for a local Hangzhou newspaper. "Okaaay", I thought. She asked if it would be OK for them to take my picture and for it to be printed in the next edition.
A few snaps were taken, and then a lot of questions asked. Firstly introductory questions like "What is your name?", "Where do you come from?", etc. Then the questions centred entirely on my clothes. They wanted to know where I got everything from and how much it all cost. I was a little disappointed as I was wearing really old clothes. I wondered if the section in the newspaper/magazine would be, "How Not To Dress". The questions were over, a few more pictures were taken, and that was that. We shook hands, exchanged business cards and said goodbye. They were both very friendly,I felt it was all genuine....
Alas, it was. On Friday Kimi's friend in Hangzhou very kindly bought a couple of the papers and posted them to us in Wenzhou. They arrived yesterday. Here's my claim to fame:
The written Chinese is mostly what I said, but some of it is completely made up. One part of it says something like, "I don't show the skull t-shirt when I am at school so I wear something to hide it." I never said anything of the sort.
I'm now available for after-dinner speeches, charity events, and supermarket openings. Contact my agent for more.